Change in priorities
07 Feb 2012 1 Comment
in Uncategorized
… sometimes life takes on different directions and evidently things change whether you want or not … the “why” is not as important as the result – the outcome of this change. Things that once seemed important turn less, or even unimportant, once you find another more important thing.
My “dog friends” keep asking me how are the dogs …. the dogs are alive and kicking! Nevertheless, their importance ranking moved all the way down to the bottom of the food-chain. They are around, still loved, but not groomed like before. The lack of time is getting to me. Having a baby and sleepless nights, I cannot find the time to deal with the dogs just now. Thank god for our big garden and the doggy-area, I can just let them outside without walking them. They are 4, so they keep themselves busy and playing while I can watch them from the window of my warm living room without staying outside in the cold.
Becci is crawling, chasing the dogs around the house. Either they play with her or they escape her, I didn’t figure it out yet.
It is quite overwhelming, still breastfeeding and working, I have to be home on time (before I have a milk explosion in the car!) god forbid for traffic on the way home … or my boss making me stay longer for what ever reason. Now daddy is on maternity leave – and now he is overwhelmed and tired. Once I get home, he is ready to throw Becci at me and just escape to another room or better another floor. Of course he never thought it is so difficult to be at home with a baby. Men always think that women when stay at home do nothing … well now he can see how much work it actually is when you are at home. I prefer to be at work and have the cleaning lady visiting us once a week. I would love her to live with us !!! That would be great to have her every day. Guess have to wait until I am rich to allow myself such a luxus….
He thought he will put her in a playpen and read his news papers …. ha ha ha … not with Becci, she is a demanding little girl, who knows exactly how to get her quality time out of everybody in the house. Once I get home, Becci does not want to be with me, either she is upset that I left her or she needs some time to get used to me again. Either way, after I get home, daddy is still not off the hook. That gives me time to eat and have a decent cup of Nespresso (unlike the bullshit coffee we have at work …). Big sister also helps with with little one, but mostly she just comes down to kiss her and after 2 minutes she had enough and disappears for another hours of facebook or whatever it is she does all evening up there in her room. Having the separate floors for the kids has its advantages, everybody has privacy, maybe even too much of it. When we want to say something to each other in the house, we call each other … another curious thing is how we place everything on the stairs so who ever goes up has to take the stuff with him and put it in the rooms or its place, lazy as the inhabitants of my particular house are, nobody takes anything and the stairs are always packed with stuff until the cleaning lady comes.
The weather here got severely cold in the last days even till -20 and windy which makes it even colder. On days like that I find lots of comfort in online shopping … for things I don’t really need … but it gives me some kind of weird satisfaction, it’s either shopping – or eating, so I choose shopping, because if I choose eating, I will have to do even more shopping, since nothing will fit me soon.
My photographer friend goes this week again to Africa, gosh do I envy him. Not only for the warm weather but for the photos I am missing out again. Last time I was about to go with him to Africa I had my knee injury, so this time, I didn’t even dare to utter a wish of going. Will have to wait another few years until the baby is older … hopefully I will not be to old for such adventures than. I would love to go to Cuba and my dream is still Argentina. Sure I will go one day. Should really drag myself out and do some photos, but it’s so bloody cold, my camera doesn’t like it when its so cold.
One of my new purchases is a pedometer, it counts the steps you do per day, doctor said one has to do 10,000 steps a day to stay healthy and loose weight … I programmed the little gadget yesterday and already forgot it at home today. Since my workplace is sooooo huge, I am sure I am making a lot of steps with my short legs from the parking until I reach my office, would be interesting to know the exact count. It might even motivate me to do more, who knows… (I kind of know, it wouldn’t … but worth a try).
Our new kitchen makes me really happy though. Sacrificed all my savings for it, but it was worth every dime. Every day when I go in there I smile. Its lovely, white and shiny, even impeccably clean on Saturdays (cleaning lady day). Now I am so motivated to cook, my family is delighted by my cooking attacks . Our combined microwave is so sophisticated that he knows himself how to prepare anything, you just type in what it is and the weight and bam, it starts cooking by itself, than you hear a beep and it is written: bonne appetite ! I thank my sis in law who introduced me to www.skinnytaste.com I can highly recommend this site. It’s weight watchers and light food, but extremely tasty and easy to do with a great variety. I get newsletter by mail with the greatest suggestions what to cook, and even I can send myself a shopping list to my mobile phone and shop on the way home according to the list.
Now I have time to watch movies again … how? While I put Becci to sleep, which usually takes from 30 min. (best case) till 2,5 hours (worst case scenario), so I lay in bed with her, our bed of course! She has no idea why we have a baby bed standing in our bedroom next to our bed… she must wonder what this strange box (her baby bed) is… she thinks its another play pen. Impossible to put her to sleep in her bed, no matter how deep she sleeps, lift her from our bed and she is wide awake, looking at us in amazement, how dare we lift her up. Than I would rock her in my arms until she is asleep, I make sure that she sleeps, I would make one step towards her bed to the right, immediately she opens her eyes and stretches her arms in the direction of our bed. She understands very well and refuses to sleep by herself. I know I know, it’s all my fault. All this started when she was tiny and helpless and the bed seemed so big for her, I would put her on my chest and she would sleep like an angel. She must have liked it, well me too obviously. We don’t mind. We love having her with us, she is so warm and smells great, and when she sleeps she doesn’t mind our kisses as much. Lynn was also sleeping with us until she was 5, so what… no harm in that at all. They grow up knowing they are loved and self-secure. They grow up too fast anyway.
